I have lost more than her though. Sometimes someone only has to get a significant other to be a complete disappointment. this year ive almost lost 2 other best friends to that. One i did, and the other is making some kind of an effort. At least we share work and have a damn good time doing so. I wonder if this is how amber felt when i married keith and moved away.... then i think, "no it wasn't because she came to New York to be near me..." Sometimes i wonder if I stopped loving them if it would hurt less.... but then i realize i may not even understand love.
When people say 'I love you' it generally means nothing to me. I take it as 'you're a good friend, ill see you tomorrow'... i dont feel as though i am truly loved by anyone else other than family. I dont even know the meaning of love in any other way than unconditional, and thats the kind of love i have for my daughter, mother, sister... etc, and the kind that my heart granted the wonderful man who gladly accepted the role as my father and now grandfather to emmalie.
There is one thing in this world that truly hurts everyone and that thing isnt anger... or fear.... its LOVE. why do people hurt? because someone they love either left them, died, lied or anything else stupid. There are many ways to hurt someone you love, way more than ways there are to hurt an enemy. Think about it.... I am sure in your mind right now you're thinking "thats not true, i could burn my enemies house down" and sure you could! but only words can break the heart of someone who loves you and it takes matches, gasoline and effort to hurt that enemy. If you burned down the house of someone who loved you... now that... would be the end of it. To your dismay you might hurt more because eventually the person who loved you, if it was true love, would forgive you. And this love i speak of isnt the "boyfriend/girlfriend" kind of 'love'... its real love... the kind of love that people are lucky to know... or like said before, unconditional.
Yesterday was valentines day, and the 75% of people who didnt have a "valentine" or a significant other, either moped about it, or claimed they didnt recognize the holiday as anything other than a way to spend their money. Truth is, they were just praying that someone would think of them too... you know, that little surprise in the mail, at school, at work, or even a text message that made their day. everyone wants love, but love to most is nothing more than words they wanna hear or actions they wanna see.
WHICH BRINGS ME TO MY POINT. LOVE:
There are 28 definitions of "love" in the dictionary. some of those being:
love
–noun
1.
a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.
2.
3.
4.
a person toward whom love is felt; beloved person;sweetheart.
5.
6.
7.
sexual intercourse; copulation.
8.
9.
affectionate concern for the well-being of others: the love ofone's neighbor.
10.
strong predilection, enthusiasm, or liking for anything: herlove of books.
11.
the object or thing so liked: The theater was her great love.
1.) would you say this is "real"....
2.) is this unconditional?
3.) lookie there! physical love.
4.) looks real... almost like unconditional.
5.) just a nickname.
6.) someone gets hurt.
7.) again, physical love.
8.) back to physical.
9.) this isnt necessarily love, its just the action of caring.
10.) i like lots of things, so do others.
11.) materialistic almost. nothing to do with the feelings of another.if anyone can tell me what "love" is other than explain how i feel about my family, please tell me. Thanks.
AND, make it also noted that I love Valentines Day, and i too also sit and wait for mail or that little gift to pop up at work :)
All in all, love sucks....
you always get hurt in the end.
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